Welcome to The Wildroot Parables weekly discussions! This is where we can come together as a community and have real talk with one another: open, honest, gracious, and curious.
This is YOUR space to discuss with each another, not just engage with me! Because of this, SAFE SHARING is my highest priority. If you are not engaging safely and with grace with others, you will have to leave. Period.
Thank you for entering this space with care!
Here’s our question for this week:
What barriers do you face when you think about giving a “cup of tea, without poison” to someone you seriously dislike, or—frankly—just go out of your way to daily avoid?
Honestly, I like to be right. And I tend to want to withhold a cup of tea from my enemy until they acknowledge that I'm right. We can get along, as long as you understand that you misunderstood me, or misrepresented me, or that you were wrong. SIGH. But that's not how it works, is it? We are supposed to extend grace the same way Christ did: WHILE we are still enemies. We're supposed to see our shared humanity and give from that place, without poison. And that's really really hard for me.
I have always been a very judgmental person. It’s almost like a reflex that in the first instance I’ll make assumptions about someone right out of the gate even though life has shown time and again that those assumptions then more often than not prove to be false. So where this stings for me is when I feel led to offer that “cup of tea” to someone…am I sprinkling some judgement into the cup while passing it to them. Megan in this thread said, “ I’ll be pondering a long time what it would look like to set aside my own judgements and offer tea, unpoisoned by my own pride. A first step is praying for them without those judgements.” I think that statement will tick over in my mind and heart for a looooong time. In addition I am also asking myself how this applies to whenever I ask someone for forgiveness. Or whenever someone asks me for forgiveness. Do I then truly pray and hope nothing but the best for those people and think more highly of them than I do of myself? Or do I sneak in a sprinkle of poison? Not enough that anyone would know. But enough.
This was such a profound read & really challenged me. And, I was struck & humbled by WHO came to mind when reading about offering a cup of tea, unpoisoned. I may offer tea to this person but that tea often is served with bitterness and passive aggressiveness cloaked as something “good”. THEY likely have no idea, but the truth is my own opinions and judgements taint the tea I offer (& let’s be honest, I’m not offering it that often because frankly, I don’t want to) Tea has the power to heal, but the tea I’ve been offering isn’t particularly healing for this person. I’ll be pondering a long time what it would look like to set aside my own judgements and offer tea, unpoisoned by my own pride. A first step is praying for them without those judgements.
Honestly, I like to be right. And I tend to want to withhold a cup of tea from my enemy until they acknowledge that I'm right. We can get along, as long as you understand that you misunderstood me, or misrepresented me, or that you were wrong. SIGH. But that's not how it works, is it? We are supposed to extend grace the same way Christ did: WHILE we are still enemies. We're supposed to see our shared humanity and give from that place, without poison. And that's really really hard for me.
I have always been a very judgmental person. It’s almost like a reflex that in the first instance I’ll make assumptions about someone right out of the gate even though life has shown time and again that those assumptions then more often than not prove to be false. So where this stings for me is when I feel led to offer that “cup of tea” to someone…am I sprinkling some judgement into the cup while passing it to them. Megan in this thread said, “ I’ll be pondering a long time what it would look like to set aside my own judgements and offer tea, unpoisoned by my own pride. A first step is praying for them without those judgements.” I think that statement will tick over in my mind and heart for a looooong time. In addition I am also asking myself how this applies to whenever I ask someone for forgiveness. Or whenever someone asks me for forgiveness. Do I then truly pray and hope nothing but the best for those people and think more highly of them than I do of myself? Or do I sneak in a sprinkle of poison? Not enough that anyone would know. But enough.
This was such a profound read & really challenged me. And, I was struck & humbled by WHO came to mind when reading about offering a cup of tea, unpoisoned. I may offer tea to this person but that tea often is served with bitterness and passive aggressiveness cloaked as something “good”. THEY likely have no idea, but the truth is my own opinions and judgements taint the tea I offer (& let’s be honest, I’m not offering it that often because frankly, I don’t want to) Tea has the power to heal, but the tea I’ve been offering isn’t particularly healing for this person. I’ll be pondering a long time what it would look like to set aside my own judgements and offer tea, unpoisoned by my own pride. A first step is praying for them without those judgements.